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"I can't get in the mood": 16 Ways to Boost Your Sexual Desire

(Parts of this post were taken directly from my ebook, Finding the Love Guru in You, which is available for purchase HERE!)

Not being able to “get into it” is an extremely common problem among many couples around the world. Depending on the root of the problem (i.e. psychological, relational, or physical), some of the suggestions below may be valuable to you.

Get Enough Sleep
Lacking the proper amount of sleep can negatively impact many parts of your life, including your libido. In addition, it’s really hard to get excited about sex when you’re exhausted. Try getting 7+ hours of sleep every night and see if you’re more interested in getting it on.

I know it’s hard to believe, but exercising can actually give you more energy. And, if you exercise regularly, you’ll begin to feel more confident with your body and you’ll likely become more willing to show it off in between the sheets.

Eat Healthier
Eating three balanced meals a day will make you look and feel great. And when you feel good, you’ll have more energy and more confidence, which can help you get in the mood.

Not only does massage have the ability to lower anxiety, alleviate pain, relax muscles, and increase joint mobility, but romantic, sensual massage can also increase intimacy and feelings of love between two lovers. So, make a sexy play list on your iPod and get ready rub hot oils all over your lover.

Be Dangerous
Sometimes a little danger can spark something in your relationship. Going skydiving, rock climbing, or ride some roller coasters and use the feelings of euphoria created by dopamine and adrenaline flowing through your body to create some excitement in the bedroom. 

Role-playing is a great way to keep things interesting in your relationship, which is sometimes a cause of low sex drive. You could role-play at home or role-play out on a date. Role-playing is adventurous and a lot of fun. And, it could easily light a flame in your relationship.

Talk Dirty
Men and women can both benefit from a little risqué conversation. Many times, dirty talk can make your mate feel desired, sexy, and naughty. All of which are great sensations to experience when you’re getting ready to do the nasty.

Watch Porn
Not surprisingly, watching people have sex may enhance your own desire to have sex. But, make sure that both of you are comfortable with this. Whipping out a porno before sex without your partner’s knowledge could easily offend your partner and produce results that are opposite of what you hoped for. So, watching porn can definitely boost your libido, but both of you have to want to watch it.

Use Sex Toys
Many times, sex toys are able to do things that humans are just incapable of doing. This is nothing to be ashamed of. If you or your partner has trouble orgasming or if you would like your orgasms to be even more intense than they already are, sex toys are a great way to achieve your goals. And, they’re not just for women anymore. There are plenty of sex toys that help men achieve more pleasure, you just need to choose the one that’s best for you.

Set the Mood
Getting out the candles, turning down the lights, and playing some soft music can all set the mood for love in your house. Doing these romantic things for your partner doesn’t only have the ability to intensify sexual feelings, but they can also bring you closer as a couple. 

Take Vitamins
Vitamins A, B, and C, iron supplements, and zinc all have the ability to increase sexual desire in different ways. While vitamins A, B, C, and zinc can enhance your fertility, iron can give you the energy needed to go all night long.

Reduce Stress
There’s no denying it- most of us are stressed the hell out. Unfortunately, many of us are involved in unnecessary activities that just add to our stress levels. Try to cut out some of these nonessential responsibilities in your life. If being less stressed out isn’t a turn-on, I don’t know what else is.

With all of the stress that goes along with working, managing a household, raising kids, trying to have a social life, or keeping up with hobbies, sometimes romantic relationships suffer. Reconnect with your partner by turning off your Blackberry and departing on a romantic get-a-way for the weekend, having an uninterrupted conversation about your innermost thoughts about your special bond, or going on a unique, picturesque date for just the two of you. Spending quality time together where you talk about the relationship can enhance feelings of intimacy and closeness, which are necessary for sexual desire.

Ask your Doctor
If you feel like you have a physical problem that is causing you to have a low sexual desire, talk to your doctor. Sometimes, hormone imbalances, certain prescription drugs, anemia, diabetes, an actual sexual dysfunction, your blood pressure, specific types of cancer, particular STDs, or other physical ailments are the cause of a low libido. Get your annual physical and ask your doctor about whether some of these things could be causing your sexual desire problems. 

Stop Smoking
Smoking isn’t just bad for your lungs. Studies have shown that smoking can cause men to have a low sperm count and can decrease the strength of your sex drive.

Consult a Therapist
You and/or your partner may also want to talk to a therapist, psychiatrist, or counselor about your issues with sexual desire. Find a local practitioner, schedule an appointment, and work out your sexual desire difficulties with a professional.

*Some of these suggestions were adapted from the
Nerds Do It Better series on www.100BestDatingSites.com


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